instead of sending me nudes you can send me 

  • pics of you smiling with ur fave stuffed animal
  • pics of you smiling with ur mom 
  • pics of plants
  • pics of ur dog
  • pics of silly lookin bugs that u find 

send me the nudes while this geek eats a flower

(via fake-mermaid)


English teachers can either be the coolest teacher you ever had or the worst thing ever

(via sxmewhat)


have you ever just cried because you’re you

(via sxmewhat)

  • Me: "Yeah..."
  • Person: "SAY SOMETHING IN IT!"
  • Me: -Forgets entire language-



My dad just said: at your age you’ll probably wanna try a lot of things. Boys, girls, being a girl, being a boy, being punk or goth or spunky. And im okay with that. As long as you don’t come home and tell me youre a republican

parents who care

(via -leothelion)



reason to not become an adult

  • you can’t use the ‘my mum said i can’t go’ excuse to blow someone off

my mom has invited me over for dinner

my mom needs help with furniture

my mom just got a new phone and needs my help

my mom spoke to me from the grave and told me u need to stop inviting me out

(via -leothelion)


I keep one of those alarm clocks that you used to see on 90s cartoons (those yellow ones with the huge analog clock and the two bells at the top) in my pocket when I go to county fairs so I can pretend that I’ve won a stuffed animal whenever the alarm goes off

“We’ve arrived; diner of our lives.”
— a six word story by denny’s (via dennys)

handy evolution chart